A Woman's Strength
In her heart and mind she could describe it as like being hit by a truck, and split open wide, especially her chest. Watching in slow motion as her heart flies from her chest towards a pile of molten lava. Then desperately slowly reaching in to rescue it, scorching her hands while retrieving it. In a true moment of self preservation, she tries to shove the swollen, dirty and burned heart back in the gapping bleeding chest. It will not fit, her body is rejecting her own heart as her burned and bloody hands struggle to hold it. She keeps trying, she tries to take a deep breath and her lungs close down so she can't achieve the sanctuary of air to relax enough to fit the heart back into the already closing cavity. Betrayed by her own heart, body and lungs, she proceeds toward the light. Crawling, limping and panting forward for help, carrying a beating heart while bleeding all over the place through tears.
Never give up she says and she inches forward seeking healing, seeking truth and begging her heart to go back into her chest. Begging her lungs to accept more air. Begging to be worthy and happy. Begging to belong and feel grace. Looking within, praying for acceptance, living to be enough. Each day, living to change and give back. Anything to make it better. To get her heart and her air back. To live and not die.
All the while she is invisible.
Toni Gomez - 2017