On loosing my job -Covid19

So it was about last Thursday that it settled in.   I did bring my stuff to work and home and went to great lengths to set up and work from home.  I knew in my heart that it was short lived and my circumstances would reduce me to zero hours, no job this week.

I had the worst weekend.  Is my reality the same as millions? Yes.

That being said, 19 years at my job...19 years of the same people...I got to see how a small business operates and how a big family works.  It has been very different but it is where I feel I grew up.  It is like loosing everything.

Did I ever complain? Yep... of course.   But they have been loyal to me and I loyal to them.  The disconnected feeling has been horrible.   We made it final.  And it is probably not the end. If we are hopeful and if the economy survives...I will be back at it getting leads and at my home away from home.

For now...I do not know what the future holds.   I spent the last four days in peril along with my other stuff.  We all have other stuff.

I am not going to fluff up this post as I do not feel fluffy.

I see loose goals of reading and trying to fix up the house. I feel the dread of fixing up something that I might loose, but if I don’t pour love into it.... is it mine to loose? So we hope and we work.

I will be making bread for family and friends. I don’t have the heart to sell soap in this time.  People selling stuff right now are bugging me.  That’s just me.  Selling stuff is great...if you do it....that is awesome.

I am deep in a heavy semester of school.....I’ll be damned it if I just milk it.  I want to learn studio lighting still life...and as the funk leaves.... It will happen.  Most of the really ugly anger is gone...so that helps.

I will write. I will be around.   I will share my world and shine my little dinky light.

I am going to belly dance with Shakira and walk solitary... knitting and sewing masks should happen too.

That is the scoop.   Love and Peace. Stay Safe.