Journey into my dream job - not afraid to fail

You go about life.  Maybe a bit quieter than most.. full time jobs for 27 plus years.   Raising kids... going to school here and there for all the things, pre-school teacher,  general degree, music...

Then the passion hits harder than ever before. 

I’ve have been a  hobbyist photographer for 35 years.  I never thought that being a professional photographer was in my grasp.  I don't know why, I guess I assumed other people got to live there dreams but not me. 

But thats a load of baloney right?  So it is back to school I go.  So it has been a whirl  for the last 1.5 years.   A buzz through a bit of learning on the  digital, then  a semester and a half in dark room... a whoosh through photo shop and light room .. a dash at digital photography...  this semester I land in studio lighting and business photography.. (night school).

I am excited!!! I got my first dsrl camera only less than  two years ago. I can take shots and frame a picture, but I had no idea how to work this  camera.  I was a point a shoot photographer for my whole life.  Luck of the draw.    I learned a little about it in Photo 60A, but not nearly enough.

But now after five classes in photography related topics, I  know a little about depth of field and using manual mode. I can blur a background without a special lens.  I can make the picture sharp and  I can make good choices with composition and lighting.  I wish I knew more and there is more to come.

It has not been easy going to school and working full time and trying to have a life with my family and other health and fitness goals.  I have been flat out beat down and tired.  I am not going to say that it was easy it was and it is damn hard.  And to get that degree I have two damn full hard semester of class left.   I will make it. I will get it.

However ready I am, I am at it this year as a first time professional portrait photographer.  I will jump in the ring and I will put away that voice that says I am not as good as the rest. I will be behind my camera taking pictures everyday and I will practice and refine and keep growing my skill.

And as a present,  I got a huge surprise camera from hubby this week.  My camera for business.  He believes in me.   Nikon D750.    My sister got me a beautiful tripod for Christmas she believes in me.  Many have said to me that they believe in me as well and these are the words and action I take with me and I am learning to say to myself, "I believe in you too."

                                                the brothers "D" formerly known as Nik.

I feel inspired.  I feel supported. I feel loved.  I am not afraid to fail.